If I’ve learned one thing over the past 25 weeks, it is this: pregnancy is an unbelievable sociological experiment.
I knew that questions would come with the territory. But man, I didn’t realize how involved everyone would be in our pregnancy!
Going into the first trimester, I will admit that I was a bit reticent about a lot of my activity. I’ve never done this before and I had no freaking clue as to what was acceptable. Should I still run? Should I still hike? Are pull-ups acceptable? My heart rate just hit 172; did I just cause irreparable damage and cook my kid? I learned the hard way that asking for help or advice quickly ended up spiraling down a rabbit hole of lectures, anecdotes, and not-so-helpful “fun facts” that in no way answered my questions. If anything, I’m convinced the responses were meant to instill the fear of God {or whomever} within me.
But that’s okay, because I get it. Pregnancy is different for everyone.
By the start of my second trimester, I arrived at the realization that I was simply going to do me. You know, that catchy expression that says, “You do you and I’ll do me”? Yeah, that. The way I figure, my first trimester had gone exceptionally well with nary a negative symptom {no nausea, no morning sickness, no heartburn, no food aversions, etc.} Everything was checking out fine with my doc so I couldn’t be doing it all wrong….right?
Photo goal: to snag some belly-and-the-outdoor shots. But in the meantime, you get these gems from the archives of Will’s photo vault.
Truly, that realization gave me a lot more confidence in how to proceed. Am I a medical expert? Absolutely not {but thank goodness my two closest friends and my sister are!} But I re-developed trust and faith in my own abilities to make the best decision for both me and our unborn child. That’s when I also noticed one glaring observation:
Everybody has an opinion.
There’s a trick to this, though, and that is that people generally mean well. For example:
I was at CrossFit a week ago, trying to get my workout in for the day. For obvious reasons, I’ve long since modified the workouts and scaled the intensity based on my capabilities on any given day. Largely, I’ve been heading to the gym on my own time to do my own workout so that I don’t interrupt the group classes with all my accommodations. This was one such day.
I don’t specifically remember the workout, but it called for 800 meter repeats. Of course, the rest of the gym members were sprinting them but I was doing more of a jog-waddle-walk combination! Thankfully, running still feels comfortable with my belly, although I don’t typically run more than 1/2 mile at a time before needing to walk {or pee}. In this instance, I was opting to walk the tougher uphill sections and jog the flat and/or downhill sections. You do what you can, right?
The Story
An elderly construction worker was out there, handling a project, and as I walked uphill by him, he called out to me and said, “Good for you! I support what you’re doing.”
I smiled and nodded, because that’s what you do when someone nice says something to you. But as I kept walking up the hill, I replayed his comment in my head. I support what you are doing? What does that even mean? Are you supporting what all of the gym athletes are doing or just me because you see my belly?
I mulled it over till I hit the turnaround point and then began my slow jog back to the gym. As I passed him this time, now jogging, he called out a second time: “Wow, you’re running too? That’s going to be a healthy boy in there. I wouldn’t want to mess with you!”
{Let’s ignore the fact that he jumped to a very large and unverified conclusion in assuming we are having a boy, but I digress. Another topic for another day, as they say.}
Again, I smiled, nodded, and said, “That’s the hope!” before continuing upon my waddling way. By the time I got back in the gym, I was a unique blend of perplexed, irritated, indignant, and ashamed of myself.
Perplexed: Why did this man feel the need to address me constantly? Does he offer his two cents to everyone or just me?
Indignant: Because I’m pregnant, do I not deserve to get my workout in without a bunch of hollering from bystanders?
Irritated: Can I please just go about my life without the opinions of strangers?
Ashamed: He was only trying to be nice; am I being an ass?
Honestly, I still don’t know where I stand on that last question, but I do know that it wasn’t a lone experience. That has been my single main takeaway from my 25 weeks of pregnancy so far: everybody has an opinion. And if you are pregnant, you will hear it because they are doing it for your own good.
{Or so they think.}
Want to fly in an airplane at 26 weeks with your doctor’s permission? Someone will still tell you a story about that time a friend did it and went into labor.
I fly next week.
Want to walk/jog a 10k with your husband?
Prepare for supportive-yet-amazed comments from everyone you see. I daresay you’ll receive more support than the runners who actually win the 10k!
Want to lift a barbell at the gym with light-moderate weight {for your skill and experience level}?
Oh, hell no. You’ll hear about it from many people!
So let me have it: am I out of line? Spot on? Somewhere in the middle? These are just observations based on my experiences thus far; I’d love to hear what others have noticed!
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