I went for a mellow trail run yesterday in the middle of the afternoon. The sun was out for a bit, warming everything up before the storm rolled in, and the air was that perfect temp where it’s not too hot or not too cold. I even splurged with Tals and took her to the open space trail where she is allowed to romp around off-leash, loving life and sniffing everything within 100 yards of her snout. We only did 3.6 miles but it was enough to stretch all six of our legs before heading back home to move rock for another zillion hours!
However, when I was out there, I started to circle some ideas through my head as I tend to do while running. In short, I was lecturing myself for not running further or faster or harder.
I hit the turn around point and felt great; so great, in fact, that my final mile was an 8:24 pace which is practically unheard of for me. Instead of being happy about it, I instead started questioning why I hadn’t pushed myself more. If I had this much gas left in the tank, I clearly should’ve gone for a 5 or a 6 miler, right? Tried a little harder?
That’s when I caught myself; what in the world was I doing?! I have no races on the horizon, am not registered for anything, and was just out for an enjoyable mid-week run on the trails with my adorable pup. The distance was plenty for my daily exercise, especially combined with my hours of manual labor in the front yard. Why the need to be so damn competitive with myself? Why so extreme?
The more I mulled it over, the more I realized that extremism appears to be my thing. No, I’m not some pro athlete and I don’t mean that in the, “I’m so badass; look at all this insane stuff I do!” kind of way. I’m very aware that there are legit athletes out there that I couldn’t even pretend to keep up with. Hell, I have friends that I can’t even keep up with! Instead, I think I have a tendency to find something I like and jump straight into the deep end of the pool.
Evidence:
Cycling. I bought a bike, went on a few 20-milers, and decided I was ready to pedal to Miami. Four months later, my quads were larger than my shoulders and I realized this was likely the wrong approach to a trip like that!
Hiking. When I first discovered 14ers back in college, I was so intrigued by the high altitude burn that I wanted to CLIMB ALL THE MOUNTAINS. I hiked my first 14,000+ foot peak (Mt. Elbert, the tallest in the state of Colorado, naturally) in May, 2002. Between June and August of the same year, I summited 30 more, while working full-time. Yup, that averages out to 2.5 mountains per weekend, which is absolutely ridiculous considering many of them had 10 mile hike-ins just to get to base camp and were very technical summits.
Mountaineering. After I discovered somewhat technical mountaineering on the Cross Couloir of Mt. Holy Cross, I was all in. Over the next year, we tackled the Bell Cord Couloir on the Maroon Bells, Mt. Rainier, and a handful of various peaks and volcanoes in South America.
Again, it’s not that any of these activities are extreme in themselves; it’s more that I seem to tackle them in an extreme manner. And even that, I’m okay with. I’ve never been hurt and I always have fun. However, it makes me wonder: am I starting to cut out that middle ground where “easy” or “mellow” activities find their happy place? Does loving extremism mean that you lose that sweet spot of just enjoying the ride?
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Thoughts? Do you ever do this to yourself?
9 Comments
This is actually an issue I’ve been dealing with for the past couple years with workouts. I was an athlete in high school and university but as an adult I’m trying to come to grips with the fact that I don’t need to push myself as hard as I can. I’m adjusting to being active for fun, not for sports and like you I always feel like I should be pushing myself harder.
This is so interesting for me to read! I think I’m the opposite. Definitely not extreme. I like to have fun, not stress out and sometimes don’t push myself. There are times when I think if I pushed myself more, I’d have a bigger reward. Living in Colorado has brought that out in me, just a little, at least recently 🙂 I’m surrounded by so many motivating people doing awesome things, it’s hard not to take note!
I absolutely do this to myself! Case in point: I’ve gone from never thinking I would be a runner to running a 5K to deciding I’m going to run a half marathon in the space of about a month and a half. I do the same thing with hiking. Sometimes I think that day hikes or hikes that aren’t big mileage don’t even “count”. Count for what!? Sometimes we all need to cut ourselves some slack and just enjoy ourselves.
This is why I dislike the word “extreme.” It implies that challenging oneself or pushing limits is not normal and not healthy. I think it’s great to have a balance of challenging efforts along with life’s daily mellow activities. The balance is tipped whenever you believe it has, when you feel burnt out or, as you did, questioning why you’re pushing yourself on a fun run. I certainly have a hard time keeping this balance sometimes, but I support it. 🙂
I do it in different ways than you, but yes! Marathons, Ironman, fitness competition – it’s fun to push your limits! And I don’t think it’s bad as long as you’re doing it in safe & healthy fashion. I think these things make us strong women. 🙂
I think as long as your having fun it is not a problem. But I think there is a time for extreme- or pushing yourself and time for just having fun and being outside. I think you feeling good at the end of a run is a good thing- it means you are fit and healthy and will make hopefully make you want to do it again:)
I think this is where my disdain for hiking comes from. But I swear, I’m working on it!
I have a feeling if you didn’t, you’d find yourself quite bored.
Whew, glad I’m not the only one! I can never not do anything to the extreme. I remember when I first started mountain biking… went from never doing it to racing in 1 month, and spent all of 2013 on the road for races. It is quite crazy, and I’ve realized I need to learn some balance in order not to burn myself out. But otherwise, it’s full throttle for me!